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Architecture of Paris

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Architecture of Paris
Message de mageos posté le 20-11-2011 à 20:16:33 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous ^^

Je suis actuellement en école d'architecture et il se trouve qu'en anglais ce semestre nous avons été amenés à écrire un texte sur "une perception" de la ville de Paris.
Dans l'espoir de rendre le devoir le plus lisible possible j'ai déjà effectué pas mal de corrections mais assez limité par mon niveau, j'aimerais trouver des âmes charitables pour me venir en aide.
Merci d'avance à tous ceux qui jetteront un coup d'œil à mon travail. ^^

Apps City

A.R. Augmented reality is a new perception of reality. Created by the superposition of virtual layers over the reality, this new space is in fact an incredible diversication of independent places. Close to the idea of parallels universes, you can simply access it with your smartphone or technological glasses. For the modern cities, full of law and restrictions, these kinds of new technologies give it a new breathe.
Developed to be used by different sorts of users, you may choose in different panels of applications. Liberty and diversity are probably the main interest of this technology. People whom need to discover the city may now choose different points of view with unique information, the busy ones can transform the city in a superposition of functional information. You may imagine your own universe and share it with the entire world …
Here we will study specifically these new spaces, how they were created, what is the new vision that they will be the purpose for the city, what kinds of citizens live here and keep these virtual worlds alive.
Paris is a good example to explore these ideas. In one hand it’s one of the most important historical and cultural capitals in the world, between “clichés” and contemporary movements. On another hand it’s an active city; workers need to go faster and optimize their time (in excess?); they promote the consumption of the city and therefore push to a hyper-functionalist development of the city.
A.R. may be a response to this schizophrenic situation by the creation of two kind of virtual spaces, one for each type of people, merged in the real layer…
We have to be careful to conclude. What are effects of this multiple identity to the perception of Paris? All apps are they created a global identity or did they subdivide it in infinitesimal parts?

How the functionalism kills the city …

In this first part, we will consider a first type of A.R. applications, developed for commercial or practical use. Parts of these apps are intended to indicate where you want to go, found the nearest metro station; drive you to the closest snack…
Commercial interests are definitely merged with these apps and therefore these ones are linked to commercial downhill.
These apps reduce the city to a simple superposition of distance between interest points. This phenomenon is amplified by spatial presence of different brands that achieve to cover the city. These apps are useful for busy people that didn’t take care of the city with or without it. The problem is about the quality of this space and sensations that it creates. Is it a good way to erase identity of Paris in a homogenization global of the city all around the world to permit a better optimization of people’s time?
This “layer” is the instant formalization of basic desire of people, approve by consumption society. Traps people in this way of life, is probably one of the most perverse effects of this technology that push the society to individualization and decontextualization.
I think, hope is in two different ways. The first is a reintegration of the city in this space; I take for example Tokyo or Time Square. These places, very functional, arrive to create their own identity. Push by concurrency and technological evolution, this way, more influenced by research in A.R. because very visible, need implication of the city to build its own identity.
The second key point is the development of virtual socialization. If people are not looking up the city there are interested in the creation of virtual communities with the same sorts of activity. We are at the beginning of these apps and for moment there are just few people in these communities. Waiting for the Facebook effect, it’s interested to think about the definition of the city by this new type of community.


il reste encore 2 paragraphes ... je les mets dans un premier post, si certains se sentent le courage ...
Merci ^^

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 20-11-2011 20:39



Réponse: Architecture of Paris de mageos, postée le 20-11-2011 à 20:20:10 (S | E)
... Voici la suite ^^


How citizens save it?

What is the citizen function in this world?
Actually, in the city more citizens have a spectator role. The city is built as an autonomous robot, bury over laws and rules. Now the interest point with A.R. is the virtual liberalization of the city!
Citizens can use these new spaces to transform the city along their imagination. Try to listen how they would like to live in the city, what kind of activities they would develop and what they know about it. Now children can play treasure hunter, tourist can discover the hold Paris and artist purposes spaces where people can put their own work and use the city like an art gallery …
In this way Paris is the theater of multiple kinds of reflections by citizens and associations linked to Paris identities. Historical Paris is recreating in multiple ways (sound, picture, 3D…) and it will be exposing in tourists’ applications. In this way you can find a diplomatic answer between the Disneyification of the city and tourists desire. Citizens can share and discover new hidden places too finally discover their best way to live with the city; you can follow the myriad of comics or movies that use Paris for scene; and so more!
All the faces of Paris could be explored and news ones, created, without any confrontations among it. People can customize their approaches and their perception of the city to create a unique experience close to their desire…
However, we can see some trouble in these applications. The main problem of that situation is the disorganization of all these worlds, actually there is not a valuable classification system of it and the most popular are generally used by small communities. Another problem is generally is the lack of progress for most of them that is create deserted spaces already accessible that is saturate the system.
Without rules the system is going to suicide itself. Hopefully citizens are awake and begin to organize themselves with communities to groups theirs different “flat” layers in news ones more interactive. Now more implication of the city to use these spaces for event, for projection of the future city or other, also permits to create news cultural identities. Finally, the development of ubiquitous technology may in the future anticipate your desire and purpose directly the “perfect” layer.


Paris, the citizens and the A.R.

To conclude A.R. need time to grow. The technology has to be more intuitive and accessible to be really integrated in society. However, it’s interested to see where Paris is going and the future problems that may happen.
I think Paris is now freeze by the fear of it future and in this way a “non-destructive” technology is may be the solution. Citizens can show too the entire world valuables future for the city and engage a pragmatic dialogue about commercial applications and the citizen’s needs.
Finally the debate is maybe in the technology itself. Individualization of experiences in the reality too promotes a virtual sociability, the virtualization of few people absorbed in virtual world because reality is disappointing…
The future is calling a society transformation but, society itself is sometimes calling stupidity like homogenization, standardization, irrational development of the future, unable to see our past. Some people think that is the technological effect, I think that is part of human nature to try bad ways to found the good one.
Paris is in good position for this future because citizens are already motivated by this historical and cultural place. Owing to the fact that Paris is built by citizens and especially its future, politicians have to be awake of citizen’s need more than perverted commercial’s interest.


Merci à qui en arrivera là ^^ Merci infiniment à ceux qui répondront à ce post ^^

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 20-11-2011 20:46



Réponse: Architecture of Paris de gerondif, postée le 21-11-2011 à 16:52:33 (S | E)
Bonjour,
je ne suis pas sûr de tout comprendre mais je vais corriger les quelques maladresses que je vois.
rose, rouge: a corriger.
vert: correction offerte
bleu: remarques.

Apps City

A.R. Augmented reality is a new perception of reality. Created by the superposition of virtual layers over the(à enlever) reality, this new space is in fact an incredible diversication of independent places. Close to the idea of parallels(adjectif invariable) universes, you can simply access it with your smartphone or technological glasses. For (the) modern cities, full of laws and restrictions (j'aurais dit legal restrictions), these kinds of new technologies give it(que représente ce it, si c'est les villes, c'est them si c'est la réalité, c'est it ) a new breathe (vérifiez le sens de breath) .
Developed to be used by different sorts of users, you may choose (in) (soit rien, soit between) different panels of applications. Liberty and diversity are probably the main interests of this technology. People whom need to discover the city may now choose different points of view with unique information, the busy ones can transform the city into a superposition of functional information. You may imagine your own universe and share it with the entire world …

Here we will study specifically these new spaces, how they were created, what is the new vision that they will be(have?), the purpose for the city, what kinds of citizens live here and keep these virtual worlds alive.
Paris is a good example to explore these ideas. In one hand (on the one hand)it’s one of the most important historical and cultural capitals in the world, between “clichés” and contemporary movements. On another hand (on the other hand) it’s an active city; workers need to go faster and optimize their time (in excess?); they promote the consumption of the city and therefore push to a hyper-functionalist development of the city.
A.R. may be a response to this schizophrenic situation by the creation of two kinds of virtual spaces, one for each type of people, merged in the real layer…

We have to be careful to conclude(pour conclure ? j'aurais dit in our conclusions). What are the effects of this multiple identity to(for ou in) the perception of Paris? All apps are they created (sens de apps, sens de la phrase ? je pense que c'est une question en "did")a global identity or did they subdivide it in infinitesimal parts?

How the functionalism kills the city …





Réponse: Architecture of Paris de gerondif, postée le 21-11-2011 à 17:08:35 (S | E)
2) suite

How the(à supprimer) functionalism kills the city …

In this first part, we will consider a first type of A.R. applications, developed for commercial or practical use. Parts of these apps (c'est l'abréviation de applications ? je déteste cette civilisation du raccourci) are intended to indicate where you want to go, found(infinitif) the nearest metro station; drive you to the closest snack…
Commercial interests are definitely merged with these apps and therefore these ones are linked to commercial downhill (je ne comprends pas ce mot mais c'est peut-être juste mon ignorance de votre domaine)
.
These apps reduce the city to a simple superposition of distance between interest points(points of interest). This phenomenon is amplified by the spatial presence of( the obligatoire quand vous prévisez) different brands that achieve to (ne doit pas être le bon verbe pour dire essayer de, réussir à)cover the city. These apps are useful for busy people that(who) didn’t(je ne suis pas sur de votre temps : des gens qui autrement ne s'intéresseraint pas, conditionnel) take care of the city with or without it. The problem is about the quality of this space and the sensations that it creates. Is it a good way to erase the identity of Paris in a homogenization global (adjectif devant le nom)of the city all around the world to permit a better optimization of people’s time?
This “layer” is the instant formalization of the basic desire of people, approve(participe passé) by consumption society(il me sepmble qu'on dit the society of comsumption). Traps(un gérondif irait (ing) people in this way of life, is probably one of the most perverse effects of this technology that push(3ème personne, es) the society to individualization and decontextualization.
I think, hope is in two different ways(maladroit). The first is a reintegration of the city in this space; I take for example Tokyo or Time Square. These places, very functional, arrive to create their own identity. Push(participe passé) by concurrency (semble bizarre)and technological evolution, this way, more influenced by research in A.R. because very visible, needs implication of the city to build its own identity.
The second key point is the development of virtual socialization. If people are not looking up the city there are interested in the creation of virtual communities with the same sorts of activity. (la phrase n'a pas de sens) We are at the beginning of these apps and for the moment there are just few people in these communities. Waiting for the Facebook effect, it’s interested(intéressé ou intéressant?) to think about the definition of the city by this new type of community.




Réponse: Architecture of Paris de gerondif, postée le 21-11-2011 à 17:30:55 (S | E)
3) je corrige le 3ème paragraphe pour les néophytes qui n'auraient pas mis fin à leurs jours au bout des deux premiers

How **** citizens save it? (manque l'auxiliaire de la forme interrogative?)

What is the citizen function ( dans l'autre sens avec of)in this world?
Actually (en réalité ou actuellement ?), in the city more citizens have a spectator role. The city is built as an autonomous robot, bury(participe passé) over (on est rarement enterré au dessus) laws and rules. Now the interesting point with A.R. is the virtual liberalization of the city!

Citizens can use these new spaces to transform the city along(selon: according to) their imagination. Try to listen how they would like to live in the city, what kind of activities they would develop and what they know about it. Now children can play treasure hunter, tourists can discover the hold Paris and artists purposes (propose?)spaces where people can put their own work and use the city like an art gallery …
In this way Paris is the theater of multiple kinds of reflections by citizens and associations linked to Paris's identities. Historical Paris is recreating(recréé ou recréant?) in multiple ways (sound, picture, 3D…) and it will be exposing(idem) in tourists’ applications. In this way you can find a diplomatic answer between the Disneyification of the city and tourists' desires . Citizens can share and discover new hidden places too finally discover their best way to live with the city; you can follow the myriad of comics or movies that use Paris for scene(me paraît faux); and so more!
All the faces of Paris could be explored and news ones, created, without any confrontations among(parmi ne va pas) it. People can customize their approaches and their perception of the city to create a unique experience close to their desire…
However, we can see some trouble(pas le meilleur mot à mon avis) in these applications. The main problem of that situation is the disorganization of all these worlds, actually there is not a valuable(qui a de la valeur comme de l'or c'est différent de "valable") classification system of it and the most popular ones are generally used by small communities. Another problem is generally is the lack of progress for most of them that is create deserted spaces already accessible that is saturate the system. (la phrase part en vrille, trop de is + infinitf. sens ?)
Without rules the system is going to suicide itself (itself avec suicide ? on suicide rarement l'autre). Hopefully(usage moderne d'un terme qui au départ signifiat "rempli d'espoir": the dog is looking hopefully at the bone.) citizens are awake and begin to organize themselves with communities to groups theirs different “flat” layers in news more interactive ones. Now more implication of the city to use these spaces for events , for projection of the future city or other, also permits to create news (adjectif invariable)cultural identities. Finally, the development of ubiquitous technology may in the future anticipate your desire and purpose (me semble bizarre) directly the “perfect” layer.





Réponse: Architecture of Paris de gerondif, postée le 21-11-2011 à 17:42:56 (S | E)
4) fin de ma bonne action de la soirée

Paris, the citizens and the A.R.

To conclude, A.R. needs time to grow. The technology has to be more intuitive and accessible to be really integrated in society. However, it’s interested(intéressant) to see where Paris is going and the future problems that may happen.
I think Paris is now freeze(participe passé!) by the fear of its future and in this way a “non-destructive” technology is may be (prenez may comme auxiliaire) the solution. Citizens can show too the entire world valuables(adjectif mal chois et invariable) future for the city and engage a pragmatic dialogue about commercial applications and the citizen’s needs.
Finally the debate is maybe in the technology itself. Individualization of experiences in the reality too promotes(c'est le verbe principal ? sinon, la phrase part en vrille) a virtual sociability, the virtualization of few people absorbed in virtual world because reality is disappointing…
The future is calling a society transformation (à l'envers avec of)but, society itself is sometimes calling (dans quel sens calling) stupidities like homogenization, standardization, irrational development of the future, unable(est un adjectif, il vous faut un nom) to see our past. Some people think that it is the technological effect, I think that it is part of human nature to try bad ways to found(infinitif) the good one.
Paris is in a good position for this future because its citizens are already motivated by this historical and cultural place. Owing to the fact that Paris is built by citizens and especially its future, politicians have to be awake(pensez à JC Van Damme et son célèbre "be aware!!") of citizen’s(le pauvre citoyen! il est tout seul? un pluriel irait mieux) needs more than perverted commercial’s interest(pluriel?).





Réponse: Architecture of Paris de mageos, postée le 21-11-2011 à 22:23:15 (S | E)
MERCIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII ^^

Je ne sais pas comment vous avez réussis à lire et à corriger tout mon article mais je vous en suis infiniment reconnaissant. Merci pour la correction super didactique qui m'a permis de revoir quelques notions et qui je l'espère pourra servir à d'autres.

10000000000000000 * merci ^^


ps : J'utilise downhill dans le sens de dérive, enfin c'est censé être un peu plus subtil que ça mais c'est l'idée. ^^


encore MERCI !! ^^



Réponse: Architecture of Paris de gerondif, postée le 21-11-2011 à 22:32:19 (S | E)
bonsoir,
oui mais downhill est adjectif ou adverbe, alors son emploi comme nom est bizarre, non ?



Réponse: Architecture of Paris de mageos, postée le 21-11-2011 à 23:17:05 (S | E)
En effet je n'avais pas pensé à cela ... ^^ je vais le remplacer par fault ou flaw je pense que en plus de la correction grammatical cela ce rapprochera plus de "l'idée" de la phrase. ^^

Encore (encore ^^) Merci ^^




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