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L2 psychology/spring semester

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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L2 psychology/spring semester
Message de eugenie86 posté le 19-04-2018 à 15:46:59 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous!
J'ai un travail final en anglais. Il s'agit de décrire le déroulé d'un exposé en groupe que j'ai antérieurement réalisé pour ce semestre. J'aimerais solliciter votre aide pour savoir s'il y a des corrections possibles.
Bon je peux pas tout publier parce que c'est trop long, mais déjà si je peux avoir quelques corrections pour cette partie, histoire d'avoir un aperçu de la qualité de mon travail ce serait super! Merci d'avance !

Introduction
I did this group work on the subject of “dyspraxia” in partnership with Soisic Vignault and Andrea Veron.
This subject is very interesting on my concern. Indeed, I have a sister touched by this handicap. So I have proposed to our working group to choose this subject matter for the presentation. They agreed without hesitation.
However, my group partners seemed not know very well the subject of "dyspraxia” but they were interested and wanted more knowledge. Worked on this subject has allowed me to learn more on the daily's difficulty for people concerned by "dyspraxia".
In this individual work, I’m going to show how was our group working; the different steps about articles searching, how we choose the articles and how our oral preparation was.


The searchs
To find the articles on which we have worked, we have used the website "Science Direct". This serious site offers a variety of scientific publications. But we have encountered one problem: the word "Dyspraxia" that we have used (in first time) as key word to our searches did not give good results. Not very much scientific articles used this word and we did not know why. After investigation, we understood that the real scientific term is "Developmental Coordination Disorder" or "DCD". By typing this new term into the search field, we were pleased to see a larger number of articles.
For choose the most interesting documents, we wanted specifics criteria: we were looking for press articles, fairly current, who teach us something new about DCD. However, we have encountered new problem with articles searching: there was too much articles and it was difficult to select one in particular.
Another difficulty is our technical English level: translation of scientific terms was hard and we have used many times the dictionary.
After difficulties overcome, two articles were chosen which are both analyze the educational model dedicated to pupils with DCD and clearly most adapted for our subject.


Articles choosen
DCD theme is more listed around 2010 than in the past. Indeed, DCD was until recently little known, and today the subject is more seriously taken by the scientist community and more documented, which makes it possible to decipher the pathology and associated problems.
The main subject of this articles is the critics of actual educational methods not adapted to pupils who suffer from DCD. They point the lack of assistance and support solutions. For the scientists, it should be good to propose supports to help them. It could encourage them to appreciate school and give them an opportunity for success in their scholar orientation.
Thanks to these documents, I have learned more things about DCD, that helped me better understand my sister disability, problems she encountered during school and in everyday life. I find important to take an interest for this disease that touch a big number of children left alone because we don't care about their feelings or their speed of learning.
So, I think important to change the global education given by school class system into an individual support in function of each student need.


Teamwork organization
As strategy, we have chosen to divide our work on three parts in sort of everybody can know what to do and can organize his work in consequence.
In this way, one person was in charge of analyze the first text, wrote the important information extracted of the text and makes a resume. A second person has proceeded in the same way with the second text and a third person was in charge to compare the two texts.
For the introduction, conclusion and PowerPoint, we have decided to work about together. To help each other’s, outside the classroom, we have created an instant discussion on "Facebook» to each share his progress and ask opinions or councils. For the presentation starting, we have chosen to integrate a little video which is present dyspraxia. It's a pedagogic way to presenting the subject. So, this video has serve us to briefly introduce the subject before talking about the articles.
This working group was pleasing because the persons has quickly agreed on the subject proposal, making the work fluid and efficient


-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 19-04-2018 19:05


Réponse : L2 psychology/spring semester de gerondif, postée le 20-04-2018 à 12:36:42 (S | E)
Bonjour (si vous postez un bonjour, envoyez, puis réouvrez et collez votre texte, vous n'aurez plus de limite du nombre de caractères)
Le prétérit s'emploie pour une action datée ou implicitement datée, vous mettez souvent du present-perfect, une erreur bien française. Je mets les have entre parenthèses mais en fait les temps sont faux, vous ne tirez pas de conséquences présentes d'un fait passé, vous décrivez des difficultés passés, le prétérit s'impose à mon avis.
erreurs en bleu
Introduction
I did this group work on the subject of “dyspraxia” in partnership with Soisic Vignault and Andrea Veron.
This subject is very interesting on my concern(ne me semble pas se dire). Indeed, I have a sister touched by (affected with) this handicap. So I (have) proposed to our working group to choose this subject matter for the presentation. They agreed without hesitation.
However, my group partners seemed not know (soit didn't seem to know, soit seemed not to know) very well(plutôt après le nom dyspraxia) the subject of "dyspraxia” but they were interested and wanted more knowledge.(maladroit, information) Worked(participe présent) on this subject (has) allowed me to learn more on the daily's( pas d's à un adjectif) difficulty for people concerned by (plutôt with) "dyspraxia".
In this individual work, I’m going to show how was (pas d'inversionen styleindirect)our group working; the different steps about articles(normalement pas de pluriel au premier élément d'un nom composé ( a man-eater is an animal that eats men) searching, how we choose the articles and how our oral preparation was.(maladroit, ou manque un verbe d'action comme préparer)


The searchs(a le sens de fouilles)
To find the articles on which we (have) worked, we (have) used the website "Science Direct". This serious site offers a variety of scientific publications. But we (have) encountered one problem: the word "Dyspraxia" that we (have) used (in first time) as a key word to our searches did not give good results. Not very much(articles est pluriel, much ne va pas) scientific articles used this word and we did not know why. After investigation, we understood that the real scientific term is "Developmental Coordination Disorder" or "DCD". By typing this new term into the search field, we were pleased to see a larger number of articles.
For(pour + verbe notion de but, c'est TO) choose the most interesting documents, we wanted specifics(l'adjectif ne se met pas au pluriel) criteria: we were looking for press articles, fairly current, who(un article n'est pas un être humain) teach (mettez plutôt un conditionnel) us something new about DCD. However, we (have) encountered new problem (soit a new problem, soit new problems) with articles searching: there was (pluriel)too much articles and it was difficult to select one in particular.
Another difficulty is our technical English level: translation of scientific terms was hard and we (have) used many times (en fin de phrase)the dictionary.
After difficulties overcome (conjuguez complétement, once pourrait remplacer after), two articles were chosen which are(à virer) both analyze the educational model dedicated to pupils with DCD and clearly most(more) adapted for (to) our subject.


Articles choosen
DCD theme is more listed (sens??) around 2010 than in the past. Indeed, DCD was until recently little known, and today the subject is more seriously taken by the scientist community and more documented, which makes it possible to decipher the pathology and associated problems.
The main subject of this articles(singulier !!) is the critics of actual educational methods not adapted to pupils who suffer from DCD. They point the lack of assistance and support solutions. For the scientists, it should be good to propose supports to help them. It could encourage them to appreciate school and give them an opportunity for success in their scholar orientation.
Thanks to these documents, I have learned more things about DCD, that helped me better understand my sister's disability, problems she encountered during school and in everyday life. I find important to take an interest for this disease that touch(le s du présent simple 3ème personne !!) a big number of children left alone because we don't care about their feelings or their speed of learning.
So, I think important to change the global education given by school class system into an individual support in function of each student need.


Teamwork organization
As strategy, we have chosen (we chose) to divide our work on three parts in sort of(so that) everybody can know (plutôt so that everybody knew) what to do and can (could) organize his or her work in consequence.
In this way, one person was in charge of analyze(ing) the first text, wrote the important information extracted of(from) the text and makes(temps) a resume. A second person (has) proceeded in the same way with the second text and a third person was in charge to compare (of + ing) the two texts.
For the introduction, conclusion and PowerPoint, we (have) decided to work about together. To help each other’s (à ôter), outside the classroom, we (have) created an instant discussion on "Facebook» to each share his our progress and ask opinions or councils (plutôt advice). For the presentation starting, we have chosen (chose) to integrate a little video which is present (présent simple, s en troisième personne) dyspraxia. It's a pedagogic way to of presenting the subject. So, this video has serve us(maladroit et erreur de temps) to briefly introduce the subject before talking about the articles.
This working group was pleasing because the persons has quickly agreed on the subject proposal, making the work fluid and efficient




Réponse : L2 psychology/spring semester de eugenie86, postée le 23-04-2018 à 15:47:18 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour votre aide! Du coup j'ai essayé de corriger mes fautes sur la deuxième partie du travail. J'ai beaucoup de mal avec la conjugaison, je ne sais pas si c'est convenable?
Encore Merci! Ca m'aide beaucoup!

Oral preparation

To get ready for the oral, we agreed on a meeting at a “la Ruche” room (in the university library) which we had booked for the occasion, the day before the oral. We have practiced our texts. Each one has given her opinion on each other performances in the aim of knowing what was good and what could be optimized. We have trained with the PowerPoint and we have added some last details at this occasion.
We have tried to work our way of speaking, our speaking fluidity to make the presentation more pleasant and captivating. Anymore, we had reflected about the questions who could be asked at the end of the presentation.
In the goal to master my text, I have trained myself individually the same evening, after our group appointment. With my stress, especially for oral speaking, I have make some breath exercises and went to bed early to be in good condition the tomorrow, day of the oral.

Conclusion

This presentation was very interesting to me. I have learned many things about DCD and I better understand my disease’s sister. I have enjoyed very much this group with which everything went very well. I thought the choice of this topic could be not suitable for my partners, because this subject does not affect them personally or because they don’t see DCD like an interesting subject.
My doubts have been quickly erased in view of the interest that everybody demonstrated, in view of our working cohesion and the empathy for DCD’s people confronted to scholar and social difficulties.
Some steps of the work were more difficult than others, like the article searching or stress induced by the oral presentation, but globally, everything went well and there has a good understanding between us.
Also, I have appreciate writing and page layout this current individual report.



Réponse : L2 psychology/spring semester de gerondif, postée le 23-04-2018 à 19:29:49 (S | E)
Bonjour
Vous continuez à utiliser des present-perfect alors qu'il faut du prétérit...

Oral preparation

To get ready for the oral part, we agreed on a meeting at a “la Ruche” room (in(at) the university library) which we had booked for the occasion, the day before the oral. We have practiced(practised est le verbe, practice le nom) our texts. Each one has given(prétérit) her opinion on each other's performances in the aim of knowing(to know) what was good and what could be optimized. We have trained(prétérit) with the PowerPoint and we have added(prétérit) some last details at this occasion(fait très français traduit).
We have tried(prétérit) to work our way of speaking(ne se dit pas), our speaking fluidity (le mot fluency existe. We tried to be as fluent as possible) to make the(our) presentation more pleasant and captivating. Anymore(ah, vous avez confondu ne plus et de plus !), we had reflected about the questions who(who = antécédent humain) could be asked at the end of the presentation.
In the goal to (on dirait du traducteur automatique pour dans le but de) master my text, I have trained (prétérit)myself individually the same evening, after our group appointment. With(plutôt à cause de) my stress, especially for oral speaking, I have make(prétérit) some breath exercises and went to bed early to be in good condition the tomorrow(le lendemain ? le jour suivant), (déterminant)day of the oral.

Conclusion

This presentation was very interesting to me. I have learned(prétérit) many things about DCD and I better understand my disease’s sister.(à l'envers) I have enjoyed(prétérit) very much(à mettre derrière group) this group with which everything went very well. I thought the choice of this topic could be not suitable(maladroit. might irait mieux que could, et soit not porte sur might, soit on utilise unsuitable) for my partners, because this subject does not affect them personally or because they don’t see DCD like( en tant que) an interesting subject.
My doubts have been(prétérit) quickly erased in view of the interest that everybody demonstrated, in view of our working cohesion and the empathy for DCD’s people confronted to scholar(n'est pas un adjectif) and social difficulties.
Some steps of the work were more difficult than others, like the article searching or the stress induced by the oral presentation, but globally, everything went well and there has a good understanding between us.
Also, I have appreciate(prétérit) writing and page layout(n'edst pas un verbe, une action, donc mal placé) this current individual report.




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